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Chippy
KJ's Leading Pundit
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:45 pm Posts: 63026 Location: Tonight... YOU!
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 Mexico Thing... and Racist Jokes :(
Ok... I got this in an e-mail from my grandma... so don't judge it on me... if it's wrong don't blame me
Try this in Mexico
If you are ready for the adventure of a lifetime, TRY THIS:
Enter Mexico illegally. Never mind immigration quotas, visas, international law, or any of that nonsense.
Once there, demand that the local government provide free medical care for you and your entire family.
Demand bilingual nurses and doctors.
Demand free bilingual local government forms, bulletins, etc.
Procreate abundantly.
Deflect any criticism of this allegedly irresponsible reproductive behavior with, "It is a cultural USA thing. You would not understand, pal."
Keep your American identity strong. Fly Old Glory from your rooftop, or proudly display it in your front window or on your car bumper.
Speak only English at home and in public and insist that your children do likewise.
Demand classes on American culture in the Mexican school system.
Demand a local Mexican driver license. This will afford other legal rights and will go far to legitimize your unauthorized, illegal presence in Mexico.
Drive around with no liability insurance and ignore local traffic laws.
Insist that local Mexican law enforcement teach English to all its officers.
Good luck! You'll be demanding for the rest of time or soon dead.
Because it will never happen. It will not happen in Mexico or any other country in the world except right here in the United States, Land of the naive and stupid, idiotic politically correct politicians.
_________________trixster wrote: shut the fuck up zwackerm, you're out of your fucking element trixster wrote: chippy is correct
Last edited by Chippy on Sun Apr 09, 2006 3:05 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 2:16 am |
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Rev
Romosexual!
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2004 3:06 am Posts: 32578 Location: the last free city
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_________________ Is it 2028 yet?
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 2:19 am |
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Beeblebrox
All Star Poster
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2004 9:40 pm Posts: 4679
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Quote: It will not happen in Mexico or any other country in the world except right here in the United States, Land of the naive and stupid, idiotic politically correct politicians.
I'm wondering which your grandmother hates more, Americans or Mexicans.
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:02 am |
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Dr. Lecter
You must have big rats
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2004 4:28 pm Posts: 92093 Location: Bonn, Germany
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Sadly, it is even worse in Germany than the US where immigrants are getting welfare for years and years and years...
_________________The greatest thing on earth is to love and to be loved in return!
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:05 am |
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Chippy
KJ's Leading Pundit
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:45 pm Posts: 63026 Location: Tonight... YOU!
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Beeblebrox wrote: Quote: It will not happen in Mexico or any other country in the world except right here in the United States, Land of the naive and stupid, idiotic politically correct politicians. I'm wondering which your grandmother hates more, Americans or Mexicans.
Both? lol... well she is pretty racist... but she's old and doesn't know any better... heh...
_________________trixster wrote: shut the fuck up zwackerm, you're out of your fucking element trixster wrote: chippy is correct
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:06 am |
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Rev
Romosexual!
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2004 3:06 am Posts: 32578 Location: the last free city
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ChipMunky wrote: Beeblebrox wrote: Quote: It will not happen in Mexico or any other country in the world except right here in the United States, Land of the naive and stupid, idiotic politically correct politicians. I'm wondering which your grandmother hates more, Americans or Mexicans. Both? lol... well she is pretty racist... but she's old and doesn't know any better... heh...
she must know some good racist jokes.  tell us some Chip.
_________________ Is it 2028 yet?
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:09 am |
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Chippy
KJ's Leading Pundit
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:45 pm Posts: 63026 Location: Tonight... YOU!
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Warning: Extremely Racist!
[spoil]Tiger Woods and Colin Powell had the same nickname in High School...
Nigger[/spoil]
My uncle told me it... I laughed my ass off and then questioned if I was indeed a racist...
But I'm not...
_________________trixster wrote: shut the fuck up zwackerm, you're out of your fucking element trixster wrote: chippy is correct
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:12 am |
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Rev
Romosexual!
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2004 3:06 am Posts: 32578 Location: the last free city
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ChipMunky wrote: Warning: Extremely Racist!
[spoil]Tiger Woods and Colin Powell had the same nickname in High School...
Nigger[/spoil]
My uncle told me it... I laughed my ass off and then questioned if I was indeed a racist...
But I'm not...
 good one u racist bastard. 
_________________ Is it 2028 yet?
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:18 am |
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Beeblebrox
All Star Poster
Joined: Wed Dec 01, 2004 9:40 pm Posts: 4679
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ChipMunky wrote: Warning: Extremely Racist!
[spoil]Tiger Woods and Colin Powell had the same nickname in High School...
Nigger[/spoil]
My uncle told me it... I laughed my ass off and then questioned if I was indeed a racist...
But I'm not...
That's fucking hilarious. But it can be construed to be anti-racist, which is how I see it.
Last edited by Beeblebrox on Sat Apr 08, 2006 2:45 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:24 am |
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Michael.
No Wire Tampons!
Joined: Sat Jan 08, 2005 12:27 am Posts: 23283
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.....I'm pretty sure threads like these are more damaging than my celebrity rants in attracting smart people to this website.
_________________ I'm out.
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 10:30 am |
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Rev
Romosexual!
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2004 3:06 am Posts: 32578 Location: the last free city
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Felicity Titwank wrote: .....I'm pretty sure threads like these are more damaging than my celebrity rants in attracting smart people to this website.
debbie downer 
_________________ Is it 2028 yet?
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 11:07 am |
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insomniacdude
I just lost the game
Joined: Wed Oct 13, 2004 7:00 pm Posts: 5868
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ChipMunky wrote: Warning: Extremely Racist!
[spoil]Tiger Woods and Colin Powell had the same nickname in High School...
Nigger[/spoil]
My uncle told me it... I laughed my ass off and then questioned if I was indeed a racist...
But I'm not...
Laughing at a racist joke makes you a racist as much as enjoying Brokeback Mountian makes you gay. If it's funny, it's funny....and that was damn funny.
What's wrong with five black people driving off a cliff in a Cadillac?
[spoil]Cadillac can hold six.[/spoil]
A black guy and a mexican and are sitting in a car. Who's driving?
[spoil]The cop.[/spoil]
_________________
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 8:21 pm |
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Dr. Lecter
You must have big rats
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2004 4:28 pm Posts: 92093 Location: Bonn, Germany
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Hahahaahahah, the second one is great, Sommie.
_________________The greatest thing on earth is to love and to be loved in return!
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 8:23 pm |
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Michael.
No Wire Tampons!
Joined: Sat Jan 08, 2005 12:27 am Posts: 23283
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revolutions wrote: Felicity Titwank wrote: .....I'm pretty sure threads like these are more damaging than my celebrity rants in attracting smart people to this website. debbie downer 
Yeah i am. But its either I stand by and think "wow these guys are being total dicks"
or i actually say it out loud.
The smart option is rarely the one I'll go for on account of me = stupid. 
_________________ I'm out.
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Sat Apr 08, 2006 9:13 pm |
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insomniacdude
I just lost the game
Joined: Wed Oct 13, 2004 7:00 pm Posts: 5868
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Felicity Titwank wrote: .....I'm pretty sure threads like these are more damaging than my celebrity rants in attracting smart people to this website. Felicity Titwank wrote: Successful websites suck. I can't remember one very busy site i've ever enjoyed being at. Worldofkj's appeal is its dedication to its userbase. With growth comes a disassociation. I like it as it is 
Which is it Michael? Which is it?  DEAR GOD, hold me 
_________________
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Sun Apr 09, 2006 1:49 am |
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Rev
Romosexual!
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2004 3:06 am Posts: 32578 Location: the last free city
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insomniacdude wrote: Laughing at a racist joke makes you a racist as much as enjoying Brokeback Mountian makes you gay. If it's funny, it's funny....and that was damn funny.
A black guy and a mexican and are sitting in a car. Who's driving? [spoil]The cop.[/spoil]

_________________ Is it 2028 yet?
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Sun Apr 09, 2006 2:25 am |
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Shack
Devil's Advocate
Joined: Sun Jul 31, 2005 2:30 am Posts: 40248
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Heh, Chip's is the best.
[spoil]Why do Indians stink?
So blind people can hate them too.[/spoil]
_________________Shack’s top 50 tv shows - viewtopic.php?f=8&t=90227
Last edited by Shack on Sun Apr 09, 2006 3:05 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Sun Apr 09, 2006 2:30 am |
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Rev
Romosexual!
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2004 3:06 am Posts: 32578 Location: the last free city
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[spoil]What do you say when you see a white man carrying a TV?
"Excuse me sir, you dropped your receipt!"
What's the flattest surface you ever ironed your jeans on?
A white girl's ass.
What are the first three words in the Mexican national anthem?
"Attention K-Mart shoppers…"
How do you find the fastest man in Mexico?
Roll a quarter down the hill
Why do Jews have such big noses?
Because air is free.
Why do Mexicans drive lowriders?
So they can pick strawberries faster
Have you heard about the Jewish sports car?
It stops on a dime, then picks it up
How do you get 5 Cubans in a barrel?
Tell them it floats.
Why do Mexicans re-fry their beans?
Have you seen a Mexican do anything right the first time? [/spoil]
_________________ Is it 2028 yet?
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Sun Apr 09, 2006 2:48 am |
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jb007
Veteran
Joined: Sun Oct 17, 2004 1:47 pm Posts: 3917 Location: Las Vegas
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Rev, those are awesome. 
_________________ Dr. RajKumar 4/24/1929 - 4/12/2006 The Greatest Actor Ever. Thanks for The Best Cinematic Memories of My Life.
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Sun Apr 09, 2006 2:50 am |
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Chippy
KJ's Leading Pundit
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:45 pm Posts: 63026 Location: Tonight... YOU!
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Here's another great one
Why can't Stevie Wonder read?
[spoil]He's black[/spoil]
_________________trixster wrote: shut the fuck up zwackerm, you're out of your fucking element trixster wrote: chippy is correct
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Sun Apr 09, 2006 2:57 am |
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Shack
Devil's Advocate
Joined: Sun Jul 31, 2005 2:30 am Posts: 40248
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Slight variation of that, but still funny:
Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling?
[spoil]He doesn't know he's black.[/spoil]
_________________Shack’s top 50 tv shows - viewtopic.php?f=8&t=90227
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Sun Apr 09, 2006 3:02 am |
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The Scottie
King Albert!
Joined: Sun Oct 17, 2004 1:04 pm Posts: 11838 Location: The Happiest City on Earth
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How many Jews can you fit in a car
[spoil]100
2 in the front
3 in the back
and 95 in the ashtray[/spoil]

_________________Visit My Youtube Account and here is what you will see.  and many more.
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Sun Apr 09, 2006 3:21 am |
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Dr. Lecter
You must have big rats
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2004 4:28 pm Posts: 92093 Location: Bonn, Germany
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revolutions wrote: [spoil]What do you say when you see a white man carrying a TV? "Excuse me sir, you dropped your receipt!"
What's the flattest surface you ever ironed your jeans on? A white girl's ass.
What are the first three words in the Mexican national anthem? "Attention K-Mart shoppers…"
How do you find the fastest man in Mexico? Roll a quarter down the hill
Why do Jews have such big noses? Because air is free.
Why do Mexicans drive lowriders? So they can pick strawberries faster
Have you heard about the Jewish sports car? It stops on a dime, then picks it up
How do you get 5 Cubans in a barrel? Tell them it floats.
Why do Mexicans re-fry their beans? Have you seen a Mexican do anything right the first time? [/spoil]
Hahahahahahaahahaha, some of the funniest jokes in a long while.
_________________The greatest thing on earth is to love and to be loved in return!
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Sun Apr 09, 2006 3:33 am |
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Dr. Lecter
You must have big rats
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2004 4:28 pm Posts: 92093 Location: Bonn, Germany
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Scott V. wrote: How many Jews can you fit in a car [spoil]100 2 in the front 3 in the back and 95 in the ashtray[/spoil] 

_________________The greatest thing on earth is to love and to be loved in return!
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Sun Apr 09, 2006 3:33 am |
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Snrub
Vagina Qwertyuiop
Joined: Tue Oct 12, 2004 4:14 pm Posts: 8767 Location: Great Living Standards
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insomniacdude wrote: Laughing at a racist joke makes you a racist as much as enjoying Brokeback Mountian makes you gay.
Worst comparison ever.
A better comparison, using the same examples, would be to say that if you enjoyed Brokeback Mountain, then there's a fair chance you might condone homosexuality. I think it's fair to say that if you're a homophobe, you're very unlikely to sing the film's praises.
Likewise, laughing at a racist joke implies at the very least that you have no problem with racism. It means that you understand the joke, recognise the stereotypes it perpetuates, and condone their use for comic effect.
If what you're saying is that the mechanic of the joke itself is what's funny, then there'll undoubtedly better - and non-racist - ways of using said mechanic to create a funny joke. For example, the joke "Why can't Stevie Wonder read? - Because he's black" uses a device similar to "How do you get a nun pregnant? - Fuck her".
Now I'm not saying there isn't a place for racist jokes. Whatever floats your boat. And I'm a big fan of free speech and all that guff. But speaking for myself, racism in jokes always turns me off. It doesn't matter how funny the joke is in principle, if it's racist, I usually find myself more uncomfortable than amused.
Nun rape, on the other hand, invariably has me in stitches.
Last edited by Snrub on Sun Apr 09, 2006 12:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Sun Apr 09, 2006 7:30 am |
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