Yeah, it's time to move on from the Hantz family of nutbags.

Wow, that was a serious disparity in strength between the reshuffled tribes. Probst calling the new Purple team "pathetic" after the challenge was seriously unfair, but I've really stopped expecting any rationality and impartiality from Emmy Winner Jeff Probst at this point.

Corinne really hasn't changed much from Gabon and is still basically a huge bitch. For some reason, though, I'm finding it entertaining rather than hateful this time around. I could've listened to her talk about how batshit crazy Phillip is (because...come on, HE IS batshit crazy) all day.

Julia is very quiet and doesn't bring much of a presence to the show but I think the Favorites actually made the smart decision to vote off Matt instead. He was close with Michael and that could be a liability down the line. I still think Dawn and Cochran are going very far together this season.

Looks like Malcolm grabs the spotlight next week. It's about time! Brenda is really invisible this season, though. Not sure what that's about...she was a pretty dominant personality her first time.

OMG, the new orange team has too much hotness. I srsly want Reynold, Eddie and Malcolm to cuddle to keep warm on a cold, rainy night there.

Eddie doesn't really do much for me but agreed on Reynold and my lover Malcolm. Reynold would be preferable if he stopped saying douchey things and just stood there shirtless, though.

I find this season very boring.

Julia is cute. And it seems she went to Stanford, so I expect we will see the clip of Phillip questioning her academic intelligence again.

Yeah, what was that all about? And then he kept calling her "the girl" instead of her actual name. Phillip is such a crazypants camera whore.

Well, both of them need to stop talking. Between Eddie's lisp and Reynold's love for his own awesomeness it would really be best for all for them to shut the fuck up by 69ing each other every day at camp.

He probably doesn't want to mispronounce her name. "I want to vote out Ghoolia."

*crickets

I just wonder if Phillip will end up getting dragged to the end as a goat for a second time. I don't see any feasible circumstances in which he would actually win this on his own merit, unless the world literally goes to hell.

Redemption Island was a funny season in retrospect. I think Boston Rob's two companions in the final three that season (Phillip and that 19 year old girl whose name I can't remember) were like the most useless people ever to make the final tribal council.

I hope that he does but he doesn't seem to grasp that he will/would never, ever win. I don't see how it could be fun to be in this game purely as a tool for someone else to win. Why doesn't he get that?

He has turned himself into a minor, minor celebrity via the series. Maybe there are peripheral monetary benefits, plus the ego teasing.

BTW for anyone who's interested, Survivor legend Parvati hosts a weekly post-Survivor show with the eliminated contestant and another contestant from previous seasons.

http://www.cbs.com/shows/survivor/after-show/

LOL. They basically reshuffled into a pretty and strong tribe on one side and ugly and weak tribe on the other side. I'm hoping that Bikal continues losing for the next three challenges. That way they can get rid of the two newbies and Philip.

So...most predictable episode ever? Julia brought nothing to this season other than getting slammed in confessionals by Corinne and Cochran for being boring.

Speaking of Cochran, I'm kinda loving him this season. He's much less twerpy and desperate than he was the first time. I liked his confessionals describing Phillip's numerous delusions.

I love Malcolm but the prospect of a successful Dude Bro alliance is sort of terrifying. It would explain why Probst repeatedly praised this season in interviews, though.

The merge should make things more interesting. Although I won't be shocked if we get four episodes in a row of the remaining fans getting voted off.

Julia turned me on. I will miss her.

Still hope Cochran wins. He is the Woody Allen of Survivor. I dig him.

Looks like the season finally started tonight.

Corinne's blindside was fairly epic as most of these blindsides are. She made a huge mistake spilling all of her plans to Dawn. I kind of hate that Phillip "won" the Corrine/Phillip war by having her go out now and probably having him stay around a lot longer because Phillip is an annoying camera whore crazypants, but whatever. Corinne's a piece of work, and we got plenty of use out of her biting sound bites already this season. I don't think she's even on the jury so that's probably it.

I can't help loving Malcolm no matter what, so I hope he manages to scramble and reposition himself from the iffy spot he now seems to be in. Also...Reynold and Eddie, no matter what they do, always end up on the losing end of a vote. It's kind of funny.

What is Brenda doing this season? She's practically mute. She was a dominant player the first time around, I'd kind of like to know just once what she's thinking.

The return of a gross food challenge! It's been too long. I liked that Cochran won it.

Fucking Dawn. Fucking Erik. MOTHERFUCK!

Also, Cochran and Dawn kind of seem to be running the game this time around. I see a final three with both of them in it at this point. Andrea seems very dangerous and like a huge contender as usual, but I have a bad feeling she's going to be knocked out by one of those stray immunity idols at some point.

A final three of Dawn, Phillip and Cochran would make me barf. But I like Cochran and in that scenario he would easily win.

My ideal final three would be Andrea, Cochran and Malcolm. But I do like Dawn and think she has improved as a player significantly from South Pacific.

I'm gonna be pissed if Phillip gets his ass dragged to the end yet again, though.

Why didn't Corinne go with the split vote? It would have been 4/3 or 3/3 for Eddie and Reynold depending on how Eric voted. They could have gotten rid of either Phillip or Sherri. Phillip will be fool's gold to try and carry him to the final 2 or 3 unless you are Malcolm or Reynold. He will be Dawn and Andrea's undoing at some point.

Corinne really bungled the entire thing. She would've been in control if she just went with Phillip's split vote idea and then organized her bro-litia to vote him out. It would've been a 5-4-3 vote.

Just watched episode 5 last night, Brandon's Meltdown. Some thoughts on the season:

-Andrea's the cutest Survivor ever. A perfect mix of cute and hot.

-Phillip is one of my favorite people ever. I love watching him. And he's playing the Coach game this year, still being kind of silly but actually playing a good game. Yeah, everyone hates him, but that's fine and he's doing well in challenges. Just needs to tone down the game talk, though that may be a moot point if he's already been voted off.

-The rest of the Favorites are good game players. I'm not sure everyone deserves to be there, especially as Favorites, but I like them all collectively.

-The Fans are eh. I don't like Reynold and Eddie's brash attitude. Don't play the victims just because you are strong, young male contestants and you WEREN'T in the majority alliance in episode 1. That, like, takes a lot to fit the criteria and be outsiders.

-I hope this puts an end to the Hantz family on reality television. What made Russell in any way popular was his ability to be brash, arrogant and ruthless without becoming a threat to himself. Willie (from Big Brother) and Brandon can't say the same. They're unstable. Russell is too, but he always could reign it in. I also can't believe how different Brandon was this time. I don't know if he was always this way, or did the last experience change him. I know he was always nuts, but wasn't he Good for God last time?

Anyway, leave the Hantz family off TV forever please.

Considering what a boring outcome this episode had on paper (Michael getting voted out), it was a very exciting tribal council. I was blindsided myself by the result.

This was Andrea's breakout episode this season. I wouldn't be shocked if she convinced Phillip to make that overly obvious speech at tribal to scare Malcolm into playing an idol. They had no idea they'd manage to flush out Reynold's too. She could also have totally lucked into that situation on accident, I dunno. But it worked out for her.

I'm amazed Malcolm actually trusted Dawn after how well that worked out for Corinne in the last episode. Dawn's meltdown next week seems oddly timed considering she's one of the main people running the game. Who knows.

LOL @ Reynold. "Give me your idol!" "Okay!" Eddie's also really bad at this. You're not on The Bachelor, dude.

Brenda must've really pissed off the editors. I'm fairly certain she has yet to have a confessional the entire season. It's weird. Erik is barely more prominent.

I'm so pissed! If it hadn't been for Andrea's last minute scramble Malcolm's intuition would have been fucking brilliant.