Teeth is a 2007 comedy horror film written and directed by Mitchell Lichtenstein, about a teenage girl who has teeth in her vagina. It premiered January 19, 2007 at the 2007 Sundance Film Festival in the independent drama category. It was released on DVD in the United States on May 6, 2008, by Dimension Extreme.

I so want to see this. Why couldn't Overture Films have distributed quirky films like this wide instead of generic films like Mad Money? I realize that they didn't distribute it at all but Senator, another new distributor, has said that it's their goal to bring films with a unique vision that normally would get limited releases to a wider audience.

Ever since I decided to blog my opinions on every 2008 release I see, I've been trying to figure out how to deal with the titles that are...less than deserving of detailed thoughts. Unfortunately I was left to confront this problem a lot sooner than I would've hoped with Teeth, a promising but ultimately underwhelming indie horror flick that was a breakout at last year's Sundance Film Festival.

Perhaps what is most disappointing about Teeth is that for such a brilliant concept, its screenplay is sorely underdeveloped. One major giveaway to this is the initial motivations of our main character Dawn (Played as well as the material will allow by Jess Weixler). We are first formally introduced to Dawn at an seminar for abstinence, and they drive it home quite heavily that she firmly believes this. However, I never felt as though we were really given an adequate reason for her strong beliefs. Her passion for the issue seems to point towards religious reasons, but the film never really touches on her beliefs, and her household seems fairly indifferent to it. I'm not saying she should be a crazy Christian or anything, but it just feels as though Lichtenstein felt that it would be great to make her an abstinence advocate but left it at that.

Then there are the plot issues, or more the way Lichtenstein goes about executing them. The film just doesn't feel complete, more like the origin story for a saga that probably won't be continued in cinematic form. We brush along the mythology of vagina dentata and how it must be conquered, but ultimately never is over the course of the film. The film's climax with Dawn's evil stepbrother also feels too sudden and too insignificant. The main reason for this would probably be that for the majority of the film the stepbrother Brad never feels like that much of an adversary, outside of his open romantic feelings for stepsister Dawn. The decision to have him suddenly release his vicious dog on his own dad and then getting the blame for his stepmom landing in the hospital seems like the movie is trying to hard to create a villain for the film to end on, kinda like Nick Nolte in Hulk.

Not all is bad or disappointing in the film though. The much-discussed gynecologist scene was worth the hype in its disturbingness and hilarity, with a memorable bit role played by John Pias as the unfortunate gynecologist. Weixler turns in a fine breakout performance, and I would love to see her more often now. Also, the above problems about plotting could probably be corrected if there was ever a sequel made (Which might be hard, since it was such a blip at the box office). In the end, a disappointing spin on a promising idea.