Ok, I thought this would be fun.

Here's the deal:

You pick a film you like (or make one up if you want to). Then, you provide a list of the cast, and assign each a role. You then give an idea of why each KJer was cohsen for that role, or how they would do as, say, Don Corrleone or whatnot.


Just to kick it off, let's start with an easy one.


THE MATRIX


Neo...Zingaling
Morpheus...MovieDude
Trinity...Ripper
Agent Smith...TonyMontana


And here's what I imagine the dialogue to be like:


Trinity: I know why you're here, Neo. I know what you've been doing... why you hardly sleep, why you live alone, and why night after night, you sit by your computer.
Neo: Em...you do??
Trinity: Let's just say that I know what movies you look at at night.
Neo: Ehm, I share the comp with my roommate, you know.
Trinity: Is that so?
Neo: Ya. Anyways, what is the Matrix?
Trinity: The answer is out there,Neo, and it's looking for you, and it will find you if you want it to.
Neo: Does it look like Adriana Lima???
Trinity: No
Neo: Aw...


...............

Morpheus: If real is what you can feel, smell, taste and see, then 'real' is simply electrical signals interpreted by your brain
Neo: So, if I drink water, would that cause electrical disturbances leading to the death of brain cells?
Morpheus: Let me ask you this: Have you been drinking a lot of water?
Neo: Yes.
Morpheus: Then I guess that answers your question.
Neo: Deep.
Morpheus: Ya, I'm like that.

................

Neo: I thought it wasn't real
Morpheus: Your mind makes it real
Neo: If you're killed in the matrix, you die here?
Morpheus: The body cannot live without the mind
Neo: But can the mind live without the body?
Morpheus: Whoa...
Neo: Whoa times ten

................


Morpheus: Unfortunately, no one can be told what the Matrix is. You have to see it for yourself.
Neo: Shameless advertising.
Morpheus: It pays the bill.

................

Morpheus: The Matrix is a system, Neo. That system is our enemy. But when you're inside, you look around, what do you see? Businessmen, teachers, lawyers, carpenters. The very minds of the people we are trying to save. But until we do, these people are still a part of that system and that makes them our enemy. You have to understand, most of these people are not ready to be unplugged. And many of them are so inured, so hopelessly dependent on the system, that they will fight to protect it.
[Neo's eyes suddenly wander towards a woman in a red dress]
Morpheus: Were you listening to me, Neo? Or were you looking at the woman in the red dress?
Neo: I was...
Morpheus: [Gestures with one hand] Look again.
[the woman in the red dress is now Agent Smith, pointing a gun at Neo's head; Neo ducks]
Neo: Whoa, She's a He! WTF??? Dude, that's just wrong.

..................

Agent Smith: We're willing to wipe the slate clean, give you a fresh start. All that we're asking in return is your cooperation in bringing a known terrorist to justice.
Neo: Yeah. Well, that sounds like a pretty good deal. But I think I may have a better one. How about, I give you the finger
Agent Smith: Don't make me unleash my dog on you.
Neo: Your dog's a bitch.
Agent Smith [after a silence]: That makes me very angry.
Neo: You don't look very angry.
Agent Smith: Botox.
Neo: Oh.

..................

Spoon boy: Do not try and bend the spoon. That's impossible. Instead... only try to realize the truth.
Neo: What truth?
Spoon boy: There is no spoon.
Neo: There is no spoon?
Spoon boy: Then you'll see, that it is not the spoon that bends, it is only yourself.
Neo: No, the spoon did bend, I just saw it.
Spoon boy: No, you didn!
Neo: No, the spoon did!
Spoon boy: No, the spoon did!
Neo: Exactly!
Spoon boy: What the? Holy hell, you're screwing with me!
Neo: And you thought you could mess with the Zing-meister

..................

Agent Smith: I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here.
Neo, Trinity, Morpheus: Oh no, you're gay.
Agent Smith: What, no!
Neo: Are you a woman?
AS: No!!
Trinity: Are you a machine?
AS: Yes, but wait, why did you say gay first?
Trinity: I dunno, I just noticed that you remained emotionless despite me being in a hot body suit.
Neo: He had Botox
Trinity: Oh.

...................

Agent Jones: Only human.
Neo: No, there are others.
Agent Smith: It was not a question.

.................

Morpheus: I'm trying to free your mind, Neo. But I can only show you the door. You're the one that has to walk through it.
Neo: Stop hitting on me!

..............

Morpheus: Welcome to the real world.
Neo: What's the difference?
Morpheus: Well, we have no bathrooms, we're hunted by machines, we've got to struggle to survive, and it's always dark.
Neo: No thanks [goes back into The Matrix]
Trinity: You know, I'm starting to have doubts about him.

................

Agent Smith: You hear that Mr. Anderson?... That is the sound of inevitability... It is the sound of your death... Goodbye, Mr. Anderson...
Neo: What does death sound like?
Agent Smith: It's the sound my foot makes when it comes into contact with your ass!

..............

Neo: I know you're out there. I can feel you now. I know that you're afraid... you're afraid of us. You're afraid of change. I don't know the future. I didn't come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it's going to begin. I'm going to hang up this phone, and then I'm going to show these people what you don't want them to see. I'm going to show them a world without you. A world without rules and controls, without borders or boundaries. A world where anything is possible. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you.

Morpheus [smacks Neo over the head]: Who the hell are you talking to boy?

............

Morpheus: You've been living in a dream world, Neo.

Neo: You've been reading too much Shakespeare, Morphy.

..............


Trinity: Please Neo, you have to trust me.
Neo: Why?
Trinity: Because you have been down there Neo, you know that road, you know exactly where it ends. And I know that's not where you want to be. So what do you say?
Neo: No.
Trinity: Sigh, men. [punches him in the face, leaves him unconscious, and then drags him with her]

.................


Morpheus: What is "real"? How do you define "real"?
Neo: That's what dictionaries are for.

..................


Morpheus: Free your mind.
[Morpheus jumps from one building to another a long distance away]
Neo: Whoa.
Morpheus: What?
Neo: You're black.

You got Zing down...

=D>

Very good. Good idea.

=D> thats awsome!!, great job Box

Somebody do another movie!!!

Good stuff.

I'd like a percentage of the profits, though. And, I'm pretty sure I can take Zingaling, so it probably won't be believable if I'm supposed to lose in the end - thus, Agent Smith will have to win this round.

Hulk

BKB---Hulk

thats alone will be entertaining enough. \:D/

His nemesis would be Ahmed Johnson :razz: :mrgreen:

The Maltese Falcon:

Sam Spade.....box_2005
Miles Archer.....Maverick
Brigid O'Shaughnessy.....dolcevita
Sydney Greenstreet.....Ahmed Johnson

Thats all the characters i can do for now. :wink:

Box, that was very very funny.
=D>