Whoa, cowboy!

This is one seriously mishandled creative talent.

Not that there's not lots of stars in the production team - - but in particular the considerable talents of Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor seem utterly wasted here. I can only imagine how they would have directed this movie, it probably would have been a brilliant B&W3DCGI extravaganza, with actual human actors only briefly seen in the opening credits.

Of course, Jonah Hex has one unforgivable deficit: Megan Fox. She is way ahead in the election for worst actress of all time - - she may be unbeatable. Every time she speaks in this movie, I could just feel the filmic bubble of the illusion of reality burst. Yikes.

And Josh Brolin! Of course next to Megan Fox he looks like Marlon Frickin' Brando, but in fact is a pretty average TV grade actor, a latter day Dennis Weaver if you will.

And then there's the real actor, John Malkovich - - which is ultimately more disappointing - - to see him slumming and mugging like this in 2010...

To paraphrase the words of the Frickin' man himself: "Jonah Hex could'a been a contender!" But it was flat out bungled from top to bottom...


1 out of 5.

You should have seen Splice instead.

I've promised I'd wait to see it with my mutant friend...

A total botch job from beginning to end.

Enough about Megan Fox.

JONAH HEX - 6/10 (C+)

Moves at a fairly fast pace (probably because it's short, thankfully) and is entertaining enough. That's really all one can ask for from it.

Jonah Hex fails to be any sort of film as it doesn't give any sort of solid story. The film is too short at 81 minutes to really make any noticeable ups and downs, and the film ends up being just a this and that concept. Josh Brolin does all he can with the script but it is weak and the action is just decent. A bomb. 1/2*

i liked some of josh brolins wisecracks in this movie, but every scene was so confusingly staged that i thought the director and editor were intentionally trolling the production. it was like watching quantum of solace again which i saw a few days earlier.

I must see this.

Perhaps a sign of how terrible it is; It's pretty hard to see this even in China and they usually buy all the junk.

Is it better or worse than Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter? I started watching that and my stream got interrupted. I never bothered to return to it.

i thought that this looked very much like an average tv show, there was no sense of scope at all. there were definitely a few occasions for nice set pieces, but they were completely missed. for example there's a scene in some kind of circus tent where fistfights are arranged in a pit, but hex doesn't really do a lot in this scene.

F

I really tried to stick with Jonah Hex, but I couldn't -- it's horrid. Megan Fox is at her worst, and the writing+directing are all over the place.

Josh Brolin tried, but I had to turn it off ... I just couldn't take another second.

Jonah Hex

The opening credits and the basic set up for the film were fine, but then it just got awfully repetitive and uninteresting rather fast. Brolin looks hideous as Hex (and really that facial scarring should have been changed for the film adaptation). Megan Fox is sexy and plays a good whore. If that doesn't tell you anything, then there's no hope for you.

I was so bored that I fell asleep. So there's no surprise that it gets a...

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