My brains they melted.

Why is Bison Irish?
Why Does Chris Klien chew more wood then a chipper?
Why does Kreuk have to narrate her every thought?
Why is this at points like Slumdog: Street Fighter edition?

Although I must say without the constant narration I really would have had no idea what was going on.

Utterly awful but it did have its comedic gold moments.

padraig how could youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

The reviews talking about how bad Chris Klien was enticed me. He was very bad but not quite to the levels I had hoped for.

Was the cinematography any good?
The trailer I saw tried for that.

Kristen Kreuk left Smallville for this? Good career move. You won't be seeing her in another movie anytime soon. Actually, the only two people who walk away scott free from this are Neil McDonough who can play a villain in his sleep and Moon Bloodgood, but mostly because her cleavage distracted me. They're the film's only positives. Everything else is either boring or inexplicable (Chis Klein). I'm still trying to figure out how he was playing his character. It's almost like he modeled it on David Caruso without ever actually watching an episode of NYPD Blue or CSI: Miami.

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